To a Hammer Everything Looks Like a Nail

Twice in a week, I have been the calm, compassionate voice of reason, taking care of others in highly-emotional and triggering situations. I don't even really want to talk about the first one beyond saying that I will not tolerate being bullied and I won't let someone bully someone else in front of me. But I did not yell, or overreact or threaten or hurl insults. I do not like when men confront me. I do not like being bullied and I certainly don't respect a grown ass man who thinks it's acceptable to physically intimidate a woman. I may tote an ass whoopin' for it, I may fall all apart when it's over, but I will stand my ground. I'm certainly grateful that in that moment, none of the men I love were there. We'd a gone to jail.

I realized during and after all of that, I did exactly what my Nanny would have wanted me to do. She always told us to try to get along. I always thought it was ridiculous to try to get along with someone who disagrees with you. What is the point? The point is that even if someone else blows their top and acts like a bag of dicks, you will always be able to say that you were calm and reasonable. If you try to understand someone instead of reacting, it can't possibly go worse than if you'd let them bait you. I'm proud of myself.

This morning, less than a mile from my house, there was a four-car accident. I was car 3. I am okay. My car is okay. It was raining lightly. It was about 7:45 am. Traffic was backed up trying to get onto 400 on the ramp right before the bridge that will never be completed.

I waited in line patiently, bopping along to my playlist (inspired by my niece yesterday) when I saw a new silver Rav 4 zip up from the left. Now, there were many cars behaving this way. It really is a dick move. 

Right after the red light, the car (in an intersection) cut off the car in front of me. The only detail not in my mind was whether or not he used his blinker. I saw the catastrophe before it happened and was leaving extra space. At the exact moment that he performed an improper lane change in the intersection. 

Simultaneously, traffic stopped because of the redlight. The car in front of me, a burgundy Kia Optima, rear-ended him. I left space because I anticipated the danger and was able to stop. The car behind me, a Dodge Challenger, was too heavy to stop. She popped me. I thought immediately, "Welp, I guess I'll be getting a new car." I had that thought with zero joy as I hopefully have another large purchase on the way.

I pulled over in the drizzle behind the Optima. I lost sight of the car which hit me briefly and was worried that it was a hit and run. I watched the Rav 4 driver get out of his car and approach the driver side of the Optima. His body language made me uncomfortable. She got out of the car. I got out of mine, checked the back bumper, no damage?

I spotted the person who hit me. She had pulled over in front of everyone because there wasn't room. I got back in the car and realized my lunch was leaking everywhere and coffee had done what coffee will do. 

I went around and made sure everyone was okay. When the police arrived (three, I mean, that seems excessive), they told me that since the person who hit me and my car had no damage, we could leave if we didn't want to file a report. I stayed as witness to the person who was technically at fault because, really, she was not the problem. She's supposed to get married tomorrow and drive her car to Florida for their honeymoon. 

I was calm and relaxed through the incident after the initial adrenaline and I handled it well. I'm pretty damn proud of myself.

The moral of the story is that construction in Forsyth County is stupid, leave extra room in the rain, be aware of your situation at all times, and driving like an irresponsible dick is irresponsible and dickish.

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